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My entire adult life I have been trying to position myself so that I could be a full time mom. Having the opportunity to enjoy my kids has always been very important to me. I didn’t really have a strong idea of what I wanted to be when I grew up, but I always knew having a family was something I definitely wanted to do.
My parents got married and started their family of 7 very young (my dad was 19 and my mom was 22). Money was always an issue for our family. I knew that I wanted to have a large family, but I wanted to make sure that I had enough money to support that family. I didn’t want my kids to experience the same stress of not having enough.
After I dropped out of college in my third semester I began my journey into network marketing businesses. The prospect of making more money than I could from a job and having the opportunity to work from home and raise a family at the same time was very appealing to me. Unfortunately it was much more difficult than I was led to believe. I didn’t have the confidence or sales skills that were needed to make the kind of income I had dreamed about.
I put lots of hard work and lots of hours into my business attempts, but success always seemed just out of reach. Just before I found out I was pregnant with my first son I had started a new business. I spent every evening after my day job on the phone calling my leads and attending training calls. My husband went to bed without me because I was determined to make this one work. It took me a while to realize that I was forcing myself to be someone that I’m not and to do things that I just don’t enjoy doing and in the process I was losing precious time with my family.
Having small children really makes me realize that you can’t get this time back if you waste it now. My kids will never be this age again. If I don’t take the time to enjoy each of these stages now, I will miss it forever. At the same time though if I don’t put some time each day into working towards what I want, it is unlikely that I will ever accomplish it.
Losing my Mom last year suddenly at the age of 60 has taught me that life is too short to put off doing what you want to do just for a paycheck. My mom was a kindergarten teacher. She had several challenges because of diabetes and was planning to retire after the holiday season of 2010.
On June 15, 2010, her first day of summer vacation, she collapsed on her kitchen floor. After several hours in the emergency room she was transferred to the ICU where she went into cardiac arrest. It took 10 minutes for them to revive her. She never regained consciousness and after two weeks she took a turn for the worst. I was 4 months pregnant with my son Lincoln at the time. There has definitely not been another event in my life that has had as much impact on my perspective.
I now realize that where I am right now is a great place. I am able to be a full time mom and make a living at the same time. I am in a position where my husband and I have been able to survive while he has been laid off for over a year and a half. We have not been in danger of losing our house or our cars. We have had priceless time together as a family. My husband has a unique opportunity to bond with our son Carter and our new baby Lincoln. And my husband was home to help me through the extremely difficult period of adjusting to the loss of my Mom. And I am able to purse what I am meant to do.
